Home > Marriage, Matters related to women > The benefits of marriage should be explained to the youth until they desire it

The benefits of marriage should be explained to the youth until they desire it

Taken from: Islaam’s Solution For The Problems Facing Today’s Youth, pgs. 42-44
From among the problems facing the adolescents is that they abstain from marriage. This is a big problem. The youth abstaining from matrimony produces serious harm and no one knows the outcome except Allah. They use the following alleged reasons for abstaining from matrimony.

  • Getting married at an early age diverts from studying and getting prepared for the future.
  • Getting married at an early age burdens the youth with the responsibilities of providing for his wife and children.
  • The most dangerous reason for the youth turning away from marriage is the obstacles which are placed in the path topwards marriage such as extravagant celebrations. And at times the youth can not afford the espense of these celebrations.

In my opinion, this is the biggest reason why these adolescents do not get married. The remedy for this problem is simple if we correct our intentions.

First, it should be explained to the youth that the merits, superiority, and blessings that lied within marriage outweigh the obstacles and difficulties we previously mentioned. There is not anything in this Dunya except there is a trade off. I am not saying that marriage is easy and that there are not any difficulties or hardships. There are difficulties and problems in marriage however; the benefits of marriage outweigh the problems and difficulties that occur. Consequently, these virtues make those difficulties and hardships forgotten. The benefits of marriage should be explained to the youth until they desire it. Marriage helps people protect their private parts and lower their gaze.

The statement of the Prophet sallalahu ‘alayhe wasallam points to this

O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power .”

[Hadeeth Saheeh. Collected by Bukhari and Muslim on the Authority of Ibn Mas’ud.]

The Prophet sallalahu ‘alayhe wasallam specifically instructed the youth to take part in marriage, because they are prepared for it and have the ability.

It is appropriate for the youth to get married at an early age if he or she has the ability and means to do so. Praise is to Allah – currently this is predominately the case. There isn’t any excuse for the youth to leave off getting married. The Prophet sallalahu ‘alayhe wasallam explained the merits of getting married at a young age. Matrimony protects the private parts, because the private parts are very dangerous if unguarded.

Allah subhana wa ta’ala says:

“And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts from illegal sexual acts). Except with their wives and the (women slaves) whom their right hands possess — for (then) they are not blameworthy.”

Surah Al-Ma’arij: 29-30

Matrimony protects the private parts. This is to say that marriage safeguards a person from a great evil. Marriage protects that organ and lowers the gaze. If the youth gets married, he will be delighted. He would not be looking here or there at women or at what Allah has prohibited. As a result, Allah saved this person from the haraam by giving him the halaal. By Allah’s bounty, this person was saved from adultery and fornication.

Second, marriage helps a person to attain tranquility and ease.

Allah subhana wa ta’ala says:

“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.”

Surah Ar-Rum: 21

Whenever the youth gets married his soul is relieved from agitation, anxiety and he has a piece of mind.

“That you may find repose in them.” Surah Al-Furqaan: 74

Verily, the matrimony of this youth is among the reasons for his tranquility and serenity. Accordingly, matrimony is a reason which numerous blessings spring from.

  1. Sana (bint Naushad Ali)
    January 28, 2009 at 3:31 pm

    Assalamu Alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatahu,
    I don’t know if this may be the case in the East, but here in the west, the practising muslim youths have another problem. It’s not that they don’t want to get married, but the problem apprently is that they DO want to get married at a young age and the parents are the ones preventing them. Unfortunately, alot of parents here have adopted this western idea that you shouldn’t get married too young and ‘enjoy life a little first’ Astaghfirullah…This is what they are telling their kids, so kids are now going off to find suitable partners on their own and there is great fitnah in the home when they want to get married at anything less that 21 years old, or before they finish school. Alot have spoken to imams of the hanafi madhab, who are telling them that the hanafi school of thought says ‘you don’t need a wali’ ?!?. And girls are leaving their mothers houses and getting married on their own with the boy and his parents by any imam who would do this for them in secret. Insha Allah I would love to have an article from the scholars on how to advise the youth in these situations…Jaza Kallah Khair

  2. January 31, 2009 at 11:06 pm

    Yes you are right sister. It is truly a sad situation. Allahul musta’an (Allah’s help is sought)

    First I will do some research on what you have mentioned that in the hanafi madhab, you dont need a wali. Are you saying for the sister or for the brother?

    This is why the Muslims today need to leave off the blind following of madhabs and follow the Sunnah. We need to raise a generation who are taught the Sunnah before they are taught about the madhabs and that we need to stick to these madhabs, even when it goes against the Sunnah.

    This is a great calamity upon the Ummah, when they leave the authentic Sunnah for the madhabs. Anytime we leave that which the Messenger sallalahu ‘alayhe wasallam came with to choose the opinions of men, Allah will inflict us with calamities. And from the greatest of calamities that has afflicted us is the presence of shirk in our Muslim nations.

    InshaAllah, this question that you have asked can be presented to the scholars of Islaam in one of the regular classes that they hold.

  3. Sana (bint Naushad Ali)
    February 15, 2009 at 10:59 pm

    Jaza Kallah Khair:)

  1. December 3, 2010 at 11:57 am

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